Some of the information available about parenting can sound like you’re always doing the wrong thing.

Sometimes it can seem like you need to take some things with a grain or two of salt. Now experts are talking more about the dangers of over parenting and helicopter parents, and the fact is, both sides are right as the ideal is somewhere in the middle. Over-parenting is subjective unless it’s really extreme, and that’s a bit of a problem in some ways.

Keep balance

As a parent, you want your child to develop the skills needed to succeed at life. Everything your children do during their normal day is making either a positive or negative contribution to preparing them for adulthood. And you know that kids are different and some have a harder time with this than others. Parents must resist the temptation to immediately jump in and fix every problem for the child or correct every mistake.

Kids need to be guided when it’s appropriate rather than have you take care of everything for them. In some ways, over parenting can be unhealthy for you, and your kids as well. If you are a parent, you know that your younger children were often the center of your attention. Yet some parents take this too far and put the rest of their lives aside as soon as their kids are born. What happens is the parents begin to identify themselves with their children, something that is not healthy for you, or your kids, in the long run. You need to help your children as much as you can by simply offering advice and help as the need arises. It will give you the ability to still do what makes you happy, plus taking care of your kids at the same time. When you do this, you can allow your kids to learn by example, observing what you do as well.

Look at yourself

Everyone that over parents their children is a “helicopter parent” by definition. Parents that cover over their children (hence the name helicopter!) will simply not allow their children to make choices on their own. Children will never learn to be self-sufficient if their parents are constantly hovering and making them nervous every day. Parents that allow their kids to play with other children can help their kids become more self-sufficient and independent. If too much of their time is spent with parents, this can affect their development. Kids that are happy, and end up amounting to something, usually did not have a helicopter parent while growing up.

The above are some of the ways that over parenting can be detrimental to your child. So you’ll need to find a way to breakout from being that kind of parent. Be patient with yourself, and it’s a good idea to talk to someone if you feel that you need to do so. The main thing is to be aware that children need to learn certain skills and lessons on their own.

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